"The Greatest Gift"

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The Rev. Suzelle Lynch
September 09, 2007

READINGS

• The quote from the Rev. Dr. Howard Thurman can be found here:
  http://thinkexist.com/quotation/don-t_ask_what_the_world_needs-ask_what_makes_you/346829.html
• And the poem, "Famous" from Naomi Shihab Nye here:
  http://www.poetryoutloud.org/poems/poem.html?id=177521

SERMON

Do you remember the last gift someone gave you? What about the last gift you gave someone else? Were they great gifts?

The last gifts I gave and received were pretty great, or at least I thought so. When my daughter and I visited my parents in Michigan this summer I took them some pretty neat “made in Wisconsin” stuff as a gift. And while I was there, my mom gave me a beautiful necklace and a wonderful copy of a photograph of my two sisters and me as teenagers – it had always been her favorite, she said.

But were these the GREATEST of gifts? Probably not.

Many people say that the greatest gift is life itself, and that our most enduring spiritual practice ought to be gratitude for this great gift. I can’t really argue with that, but it isn’t the “greatest gift” I want to explore today.

Howard Thurman hinted at the gift I’m thinking about when he said, “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Dr. Thurman spoke these words from a deep knowing. In 1944, as World War II was still raging, he co-founded the nation’s first non-denominational, interracial church, following the vision that made him come alive: the vision of a church where all seekers were welcome, no matter their creed or color. He was, for a time, a minister in fellowship with the American Unitarian Association, and his vision, radical for his time, is one we Unitarian Universalists share today – expanded to honor diversity in all its beautiful forms.

Dr. Thurman wasn’t telling us to follow our bliss, though, nor to do only what feels good. He wasn’t saying, “Do what you love, and the money will follow” either (to quote the title of a popular book from some years ago). He said that what the world needs is for us to come alive.

How do we do this? How do we come alive? First we have to look honestly at our lives – which is not an easy process -- not only because we are, most of us, unused to it, but also because what we find may make us terribly uncomfortable. Breathing our inquiry into the deepest crevices of our being, and finding the spark that blazes flame when we ask: what makes me come alive might mean confronting all of the ways in which we have compromised, deadened ourselves to life, given in to our fears or to the need to maintain the status quo. As our Transcendentalist ancestor Henry David Thoreau wrote, “Most men live lives of quiet desperation, and go to the grave with the song still in them.”

And yet, I suspect that if we do ask the question and engage the search, we will find not only despair, but also hope. “For we all have, without exception,” says Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfield, “A very deep longing to give – to give to the earth, to give to others, to give to the society, to work, to love, to care for this earth. That’s true for every human being. . . And there’s a tremendous sorrow for a human being who doesn’t find a way to give.” (from Roots of Buddhist Psychology)

This longing to give is what I believe is the greatest gift beyond the gift of life itself (and is, quite naturally, a response to the gift of life!). The longing to reach out from our separate selves and touch another person, to be of service – this is, indeed, a grateful response to our aliveness. It's a gift that has its roots in the interdependent, interconnected nature of our being. In Judaism, this interconnection is expressed in the idea of Tikkun olam, or the repair of the world. It is said that sparks of holiness are imprisoned in all the stuff of creation, yearning to be set free – to be reunited with their source – and that this will occur through human action. Rabbi Lawrence Kushner writes, “When we return something to its proper place. . .; when we use something in a sacred way. . .; when we treat another human being as a human being, the captive sparks are released and the cosmos is healed. . . . And every human action .. . plays a role in the final restitution.” (Lawrence Kushner, in The Book of Words.)

What would our lives be like if we truly believed that our every action affects the process of mending the world? That everything we did could lead to a larger wholeness! That belief, no doubt, would make us come alive in the way Dr. Thurman suggests.

But sometimes the only way to know what makes us come alive is to notice what makes us angry, or upset, or frustrated. This was certainly the case for two very different women, famous women, whose names have been in the news recently due to the ten-year anniversaries of their deaths, which occurred during the same week in 1997.

Mother Teresa, was serving as principal of a Catholic school for upper-class young women in Calcutta when she found she could no longer ignore the lepers, urchins and the dying who were in the streets and alleys surrounding the cloister walls. She was outraged by the way they were treated, and felt herself called by God to serve these poorest of the poor; to help them heal if possible, and if not, to give them loving care as they died. I never read that Princess Diana used those words, “called by God,” but she, too, clearly could not help but give – and her widely-publicized appearances talking with and touching people living with AIDS did much to raise funds for AIDS care and research, and also to help lessen the world’s fear of people living with AIDS.

Even though they both received it, neither Mother Teresa nor Princess Diana sought personal fame or reward for their good deeds. Like Naomi Shihab Nye’s poem, the fame they sought was like the river to the fish, or the boot to the earth, famous in the way that Nye says the buttonhole is famous, not because it did anything spectacular, but because it never forgot what it could do.

But for us regular folks, it is hard, sometimes, to give, especially without expecting anything in return. One man (Joseph Goldstein) tells this story of a time he lived in India. He was there to practice meditation. He writes, “Anybody who spends any time at all in India must come to terms with the countless . . . people begging. It is just part of reality there, . . . I was in the bazaar one day buying some fruit. There were a lot of beggars around, and one little boy was holding out his hand. He looked hungry, so I took one of the oranges I had bought and gave it to him. It felt good to respond to him. But he just took the orange and walked away. Not a smile, not a nod, not a thank-you, nothing. Only when he did that,. . . did I see clearly that some part of my… generosity, my motive, had wanted an acknowledgment. I had not been expecting effusive thanks. . ., but I had wanted something. And this child just took the orange and walked away.” (in Transforming the Mind, Healing the World.)

This is the shadow side of the great gift of our longing to give – that we sometimes do it for the thanks, for the fame, for a reward other than that which comes from within. I suspect all of us feel this way at times – I know I do. And it helps explain why we might sometimes feel cynical when hearing about the “good works” of large corporations or wealthy people – it seems like they do it only to improve their reputations.

I think our deep need to give turns shadow in this way – turns into the longing for acknowledgment or reward – when we lose our sense of connection with one another. When we lose the feeling that we all share the divine spark and must work together to release it into the world.

That’s the secret of Mother Teresa and Princess Diana and Howard Thurman, after all. They appeared to act as individuals, but what empowered them was their deep roots in community. The context for Mother Teresa’s work was always her convent, the Sisters of Charity. Living within the web of monastic community for many decades, she came to see her life as deeply intertwined with Jesus, with her sisters of faith, and with the people she served. For Princess Diana, the context was family -- the rich and powerful royal family – whose circle she broadened to include those who suffered and were reviled when she used her royal influence for the greater good. And for Dr. Thurman, the context was always church, liberal Christian community.

I do not mean to say that individuals, acting alone, cannot make a difference. I believe every action we take that is motivated by love helps release the sparks and repair the world – even when we do expect to be thanked or rewarded or to see the results of our good deeds.

Because what matters – what the world needs -- is for us to come alive. And what makes us come alive could be as simple and individual as writing a letter to the editor about an issue we believe is important, or letting compassion for a suffering child we encounter fuel our love for our own children. It could be as easy as reaching out a hand to a friend we know is having a difficult time, or as painful as letting our grief over the death of someone we love or admire inspire us to memorialize them with acts of service. But we cannot forget that actions that are grounded in community, taken with others, will always have a greater power.

What makes you come alive? What spark do you sense around you needing to be released? Where have you become too comfortable, too complacent about life as it is?

I invite you to listen for the whisper of that greatest gift: the longing to be of service; and to bring your longing into this community, finding here the courage to act, companions for your journey, and the knowledge that you need never forget the beauty and the power of what you can do when you come alive.

Amen.